Saturday, May 31, 2008

In honor of summer

Here's a funny sent to me by my friend Tacky Jacky. Enjoy!

BBQ RULES We are about to enter the summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion: Routine... (1) The woman buys the food. (2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert. (3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand. Here comes the important part: (4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL. More routine.... (5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery. (6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation. Important again: (7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN. More routine.... (8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table. (9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes. And most important of all: (10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts. (11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off.' And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....






Thursday, May 22, 2008

Brimfield goodies


For those of you who asked (and those of you who didn't) here's a photo of Maisy's Daisy at Seaside Sisters, decked out with all the Brimfield treasures I carted all the way from Massachusetts. If you look carefully you can see the reverse painted mirror with flamingos on the back wall, the large yellow McCoy flower pot, the amazing plant stand with original turquoise art pottery flowerpots on the far left, and the sweet painting of roses on the far right. My daughter Katie and friend Susan Kelleher (she's the Seaside Sisters madam) helped load it all in and make it look artistic. So now, it's all ready for you junkers to take home. Have a happy, safe, Memorial Day weekend. I myself have some more junking to do in the morning. And over the long weekend, I plan to do mostly nothing, except cook some ribs on Sunday, for family and friends. And after Monday? I SWEAR BY ALL THAT'S HOLY THAT I WILL RETURN TO WRITING THE FIXER UPPER. Really.

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Sunday, May 18, 2008

Six Flags Over Brimfield







I have a new happy place--and it's called Brimfield. Last week my friend Beth and I set out upon the great American junking journey, driving from Raleigh, NC, all the way to Brimfield, Mass. in a rented white cargo van, which we quickly nicknamed Chester, for reasons that are too politically incorrect to go into. On the New York portion of the trip, Brunhilda, Beth's GPS unit, routed us through the George Washington Bridge and Manhattan, which was unbelievably scary. But we made it--with Beth driving the whole way. Monday night we checked into our motel room in Auburn, Mass, and Tuesday, we got up at the butt-crack of dawn--4:30 a.m. to drive the 20 minutes to Brimfield, where we were delighted to survey a full five miles of farm fields full of antiques. The Brimfield Antiques Market is the largest outdoor market in the U.S. We started Tuesday at the daylight opening fields--Crystal Brook, Shelton's, Quaker Acres. Beth's first score was the most charming oil portrait of a little blonde girl in a pink dress. We named her Clarissa, and she was really a head-turner. I can't even remember now what my first purchase was, but I quickly purchased a collapsible rolling cart to hold all my treasures as I trolled the fields for goodies for me--and for Maisie's Daisy, my antique booth down at Seaside Sisters on Tybee Island. The Brimfield publicists claim that 5,000 dealers sell at this market, and I can believe it--along with about 10,000 shoppers who come from all over the world. We saw great antiques from New England, the Southwest, Europe, everywhere really, and lots of stuff we don't normally see on our junking forays around the South. As I told a friend, Brimfield is my Disneyworld, my Six Flags, my Coney Island. My favorite purchase was the hot pink screen door that I hope to someday use for my virtual beach house. I also bought five pairs of shutters with great blue-green paint and crescent moon cut-outs also destined for my someday beach house. I bought two great blue chenille bedspreads, a wonderful yellow grandmother's flower patch quilt in a sunny yellow, a sweet little pine dresser with mirror, a forties mirror that has a reverse-painted flamingo, a pair of blue-green lamps, a folk-art children's toy Noah's ark with hand-painted animals, an Ohio Art child's tin litho sand shovel (I collect these tin litho sandpails and watering cans), a yellow McCoy flowerpot, a cool barkcloth dust-ruffle that's destined to become cushions for a rattan armchair, a sweet child's chair in beachy turquoise, and yes, to Beth's chagrin, a six-foot wooden folk-art Uncle Sam whose moveable arms once held an American flag at the entrance to a Maine hunting camp. We slowed down our assault only for potty breaks--yes, I actually used a porta-potty--and lunch. Brimfield has a wonderful food court, which is situated in the courtyard of a 50s-era motel, called, fittingly, New England Motel.



Beth opted for lobster rolls the first two days, and a full 2-lb. lobster on our last day. I sampled sausage and peppers, and a fantastic sandwich called a Pilgrim Roll--fresh roasted turkey breast with cranberry sauce on a yeast roll. We also tried out the apple crisp with ice cream and hand-cut french fries. Excellent junking food. At the end of our first full day we were just barely able to drag ourselves back to the motel, hit a chain restaurant for dinner, shower, and then to bed by 9 pm. Wednesday we were back in line for the 6 am opening of the New England Motel field, followed by Heart-of-The-Mart at 9am, and Hertan's at noon. I think New England Motel was my favorite field, but really, I think I found treasures in each field I shopped. One of the best things about Brimfield is the people. The dealers were unfailingly nice, willing to bargain, and just plain cool. We chatted with strangers over lunch and in lines, and everybody was really lovely. The weather was unbelievable most of the time, morning temps were in the low '50s, so we bundled up in jackets and shawls, but by the afternoon, it had gotten sunny and warm--in the low '80s. We did have a little rain on our last morning, Thursday, but that lasted for only about 20 minutes. My final tally of purchases numbered around 46, and I spent just about what I'd budgeted for the visit. On Thursday, after a final lunch at New England Motel, we reluctantly headed Chester South for the trip home. and yes, we're already planning our next Brimfield excursion. Shows are also held in July, but we've decided that will be too hot. Maybe September, if I finish my new book on time.

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Saturday, May 10, 2008

May means Mothers Day and Grads


It was a very special weekend for our family. Thursday, I flew to Phoenix with Mr. Mary Kay and the Boomerang Boy to attend our daughter Katie's graduation from Arizona State University. We were met here by my son-in-law Mark's family, who were also here for this great occasion. This is an event that has been eight years in the making. Katie started school at the University of Missouri, which is where she met Mark, who is a Missouri boy. She dropped out of Mizzou in the middle of her junior year, eventually moved back to Atlanta, where she worked at various jobs before returning to school at a local community college. After the kids got married and moved to Phoenix, Katie attended a community college here before moving on to Arizona State. Thursday night we had a big family dinner out, and the kids gave Jane and I our mother's day gifts--a spa day! Friday we lolled around the Lamar Day Spa here in Phoenix, where we were treated to facials, massages, pedicures, and for me, a haircut and color. What a relaxing experience. This morning, we loaded up the rental car and motored over to Wells Fargo Arena, where we were thrilled to cheer for our girl. Katie graduated with a B.A. in interdisciplinary studies, with concentrations in communications and journalism. Next stop--Atlanta--where Mark has accepted a job, and where Katie is job hunting. Now, if anybody reading this would like to buy an ADORABLE home in Chandler, AZ. you should definitely email me care of this blog. Did I mention the house is ADORABLE? And that, said buyer would be entitled, by buying said house, not only to an ADORABLE house, but also, a lifetime of free Mary Kay Andrews books? I mention this because, until said house is sold, Katie and Mark, and their dog Tybee, will be residing at Chez Mary Kay, in the room recently vacated by Boomerang Boy, who has decamped to a rental house nearby. This would bring the dog population at Chez Mary Kay up to THREE, which may or may not be in violation of county ordinances. In the meantime, tomorrow, I start the great American junk roadtrip with my friend Beth. We are motoring up to the Brimfield Antique Market in Mass., where I hope to score lots of primo junk, and where I also hope to send back dispatches and photos. Happy Mom's Day to All!